determination + nature

hi all. i am inspired by lucy and michelle to blog constantly. not only when im down. so let me try. and succeed. i wont say the negative part to that cos then ill definitly fail.

today we had speech day. laura wey is a crazy lady because she gets awards for like 4 or 5 subjects including my favourite subject drama. thanks for stealing that. actually she didnt steal it. she works good and hard and going through her logbook, you will definitly see the time and effort she spends bullshitting um inspirational crap. i really should tak some time out to do that because i would totally get a good mark for it! i think thats all i need. to work harder at bullcrapping in my logbook. actually though, sometimes i think that maybe even that wont be able to gain me that drama award. last year i remembered thinking, damn. i came like second in the class. not good enough!! so i was inspired for about two hours to get the drama award. funnily i got to this year and i just started to slack off. i love performance and stuff, but yeah i definitly have to push harder next year. the problem with me is that i dont usually follow through with the projects i want to do. hopefully, now with a little dynamite friend i have called JENNY i will start to finish it. for example, my resume. I NEED A JOB LIKE TOTALLY. my sister makes me look stingy because im so poor and shes so rich she has enought to fling around and shout people. DAMN HER.

i am going to new zealand, south isand on christmas or boxing day. i really hope i go to this beautiful waterfall they have there. its supposed to be the second largest waterfall after niagara falls. my aunt went there and she says its massive. massive= beautiful. okay maybe only in the case of that waterfall. i love being with nature. nature is so soft and no matter how loud some loud thunderous water is it still has a soothing effect on me. i just sit there for hours if i am confused about something, in front of water or something. i can let the outside breeze sort my mind out. i hope my relatives being around dont ruin the effect. PLEASE no, CARMEN GET THIS, CARMEN GET THAT, CARMEN YOU ARE A STUPID BITCH. need some peace at mind.

determination is what i need.